clashes

God, You rock!

well, just something to share here about God's answer to my prayer again. i know it's God's answer because it is kinda a miracle too.

Previously, my debating trainings or tournaments always clash with my church activities, services, or even my Christian Fellowship's activities, due to the fact that most people are free on weekends, that's the best time to get people to come for some trainings (i personally take tournaments as trainings). the thing is, the basic thing as a follower of Christ is to attend church. Some people may say it's not a sin if you don't attend church. But to me, attending church and listening to sermon is important, for that's when your heart is not listening attentively to God's voice in your heart, He'll put it in an audible way, cakap terang-terang and get the message across. That's why i'd try to sleep early on Saturday night and drag myself up every Sunday morning to attend church service.

The thing is, i also view debate training very important to me too. Continuous reading on issues sure help a lot, but the saying of "practice makes perfect" still proven standing. i really need a lot of practices to speak in front of my seniors to let them correct me, method and manner wise. How my speech structure is, how my facial expression and gesture are, etc. maybe one can record his or her own speech and play it back, to correct oneself, or look at the mirror while giving a speech. something are lacking here : how well you co-operate with others? how your real performance is when you are disturbed by your jumping-up-and-down opponents who want to ask POV (point of view). it's too much to work alone. i need real people to practise with. besides, i miss those people there, although i will have to travel that far to Bangi for training...

My problem is, everytime it really clashes with activities which will help me grow spiritually. every training or tournament sure clashes with those activities. i've been asking God a lot of time why these things happened, and it appeared that God continue to challenge me on which one i choose, Him or debate. i picked debate, everytime... At the same time, i also asked God's direction, because although i chose debate rather than the activities, He still showed His great mercy on me in my debating life. such as easy opponents during match-ups in Royals. there's once also during the Royal tournament, i was asking God about this same question until i came across this sentence in Bible : ..."Do not be afraid; keep on speaking, do not be silent. For i am with you, and no one is going to attack and harm you, because i have many people in the city." [ACTS 18:9-10]. i was doing my daily Bible reading and the instant i came to this sentence, it just struck me that it's God showing me sign. It's hard to explain, but i really felt that Jesus is talking to me with His word ( He said this to Paul. ) i kept repeating the sentence. "Do not be afraid; keep on speaking..." i told myself. Yes, God, i won't stop speaking. i'll strive harder to become a good debater. i'll make You proud and i want to proove that You bless Your children in every way, even in debating! You've made me in this way at the first place. You've led me into UKM English Debating Team ever since i enter this university.

But the problem of clashes still happened. i became confused. i've been giving up chance to know God better, but He still bless me in debate... i know something wrong here. i prayed about it again. then here comes, a speedy answer too. i was suppose to attend this IIU open on last weekend 20-21 jan. then Jun Hoe who had contacted IIU people said that it's better for us to attend the coming rounds, which are on 24-25 feb and 3-4 mac. CF camp was on 20-21 jan... it clashed. at first i didn't think of going to that camp is because i have no money. although it's only RM50 per person and it's in Pulau Pangkor!! such a great place with fabulous price! another reason that pulled me back is my study. now the debating team is planning to have training once every fort night. so that very weekends suppose i'm free, should use it for my studies or clear up stuff for other activities. then came the x factor : I AM SICK. yea, am. i'm still having cough and flue, with occassional sneezing. The sore throat period had finally passed.

Anyway, come back to the clashes. So, this is the first time they didn't clash! too bad i attended neither. i went to starbuck to search for information for my assignments. i have 2 assignments at hand. thank God for the fast wireless there, i enjoyed my surf that saturday afternoon.

Then on Sunday morning, i received a message from Jerry, the one in-charge of our debate training this weekend. He's the one prefers to have it on Sunday, as well as most of the people. i was very surprise to get him informing me that the coming training will be on Saturday!! Again, they didn't clash! i can attend the training then the next day i still attend church service! at least, this time i'm more willing to travel to Bangi :)

Then on wed, I received a message from stella saying that we managed to get a van from UKM, even without a letter to support as a proof of our “legal” training, haa. That’s great.

God, i know You really care... i'm touched because You have shown me great mercy and grace. i want to thank You sincerely and want to tell the world, starting from this blog. May those with eyes can read. Amen.